Ever dreamt of deceased loved ones? The Chinese believe that the deceased 'communicates' with the living through dreams. However, they also believe that in these dreams, the deceased cannot speak, touch nor be in close proximity to the living. I guess these are the rules of the game.
I do dream of my paternal grandmother whom I call 'MaMa'. Although not often but as compared to other members of my family, I had the most "encounters" with her. She passed away on 27 September in the year 1999 after a brief battle with cancer. I would say brief in comparison to some cancer patients who suffer the horrible ravages of the disease for many years, causing long and painful sufferring. She never speaks to me in my dreams but somehow, telepathically (I guess) I always seem to understand what she means to convey.
The times when I do dream of her, I wake up awash in emotions. I feel a certain closeness to her and I just wish that I could have had a little more time with her. When MaMa was alive, she was a stern woman and never one to show tenderness. She was a disciplinarian but she brought me up and imparted her knowledge accummulated from the school of hard knocks. Life was never easy for MaMa. She came to Malaysia in the early 30s with hardly a penny to her name. She met and married my grandfather and bore him 4 children. When my father was 9, my grandfather died in the hands of the Japanese soldier (during the invasion of Malaya). Since then she single handedly brought up her own children and also those of her sister and close friend (at one point there were 8 mouths to feed including her own!)
She came to me in my dreams again. This time with her bags packed and a sad feeling in the air. I asked her if she was going to visit my aunt in Sydney but she signalled 'no' and waved goodbye. She said nought a word but somehow I felt that it was our last 'goodbye'. Could it be that she came to tell me that she has gone on to her next re-birth and that she will no longer "visit" me?
I woke up with mixed feelings: sadness and yet happy that she has 'moved on'. I can only pray that she will have a good re-birth but if that is not her fate, then I pray that she will have the courage to bear it and to make the necessary "amends" in this re-birth to ensure a better one in the next life. I realise that I might have lost some of you readers at this juncture but all I can say is that as a Bundhu (more on this in my later entries), I am a staunch believer in "reincarnation".
Back to my grandmother... It remains to be seen if her message to me in my last dream was that of 'goodbye'. I will surely miss her more... ~Jas ("~)
We were only too glad to dump our respective loads and Andrew wasted no time in unpacking (and showing off) our food. Lunch was served! A delicious packet of "nasi lemak" (a popular local fare of rice cooked in coconut milk with condiments) with a choice of either chicken or squid "rendang" *yum yum!* Dessert was a choice of bananas (the healthier option) or potato chips (the not-so healthy option). The hike coupled with the crisp forest and waterfall air worked up a good appetite and lunch was polished off in a matter of mere minutes.
was icy cold *brrr~!* but we soldiered on nevertheless. We are not going to let our hike go to waste! No sir-ee..! We'll splash around even if our faces turned blue. Fortunately, we live in a tropical climate and it was mid-afternoon thus we quickly got used to the biting cold and ventured to the cascades for a nice "massage" (,")
I've got another two friends getting married on the same last Saturday of June. I know both the brides well. One is my friend from when I was sweet sixteen and the other is from my varsity days. I've been double booked on that day but fortunately, my varsity friend will have an 'encore' wedding reception back in our hometown on July 1. I've been asked to MC this event.
I've been invited to another wedding on July 8 in the Lion City of Singapore but I had to turn down the invite due to work commitments overseas.
When I attended another varsity chum's wedding in my hometown in May, I was pre-booked to MC at another mate's wedding in October. Since December 2005, I've also been 'summoned' to attend my ex-colleague's wedding in December this year.
Sitting here counting the number of wedding invitations I've received so far is daunting. There will be many more to come in the next couple of years as most of my friends of like age are settling down to wedded bliss and my services as 'ji mui' or MC will be called to the fore. I am running out of ideas to 'test' the groom's unrequited love for his bride. Just like I am running out of speech snippets for Chinese wedding MC-ing. There are very limited resources on the Net to this effect.
I am calling all readers who are experience or otherwise in either of these fields to please contribute your ideas for the benefit and greater good of all future 'ji muis' and Chinese wedding MCs. The grand plan is to gather all these ideas and organise them onto a website. Consider it as my contribution to the hoi polloi who are playing 'supporting roles' to the happy couple(s), traipsing down the aisle toward marital bliss. Please send all suggestions to ideas2me@gmail.com. No viruses, spam or offensive/malicious emails please. ~Jas (;") 09.06.2006~
I might be a sentimental wuss but being the eldest of the pack, I can't help but feel a sense of nostalgic pride when I witness the marriage of my pals. Yes, I'm one of those who dabs furiously at my eyes at weddings. I remember the overwhelming rush of emotions when I witness Lisa sign her name on her marriage certificate. When I marry off my children in the future, I wonder if I will have the same feeling of relief, bittersweet happiness intermingled with a small sense of loss?
